While it would be great for a critical mass of us to find our happiness living abroad the reality is the bulk of us will live here in the US (or other countries of origin) so this means maximizing life and opportunities to our benefit. To that end I would suggest cooperative living communities. I know that phrasing can engender negative thoughts but consider this; these would not be for just any woman but those who share the same values of the divestment philosophy. These would be women who preferably have some affiliation with one another and all would be responsible for carrying their own weight.
Here’s a link to one of these communities that is located in the Takoma Park section of NW Washington DC. I’ve driven past this community many times over the years and it looks like a self-contained sustainable village. Living in an arrangement like this takes a certain level of maturity and commitment. This will not be an inexpensive investment (on the other hand if you’re in the prospects of buying a house I think you can financially handle this) but if you’re serious about getting away from undesirables I feel it could be well worth your efforts. Also the coop’s created by my readers don’t have to have the folksy-quakerish feel about them, they could just be your typical condo or apartment building. How its is held would be the differentiating factor.
Here’s another link providing excellent information and resources on how to start a coop community. This one is from the National Association of Housing Cooperatives. This site gives a lot great information on the basics and things to consider should this be the route you choose.
If you are serious about making a move away from your current toxic environment I suggest giving this serious consideration.